Dear Hachi

Dear Hachi,
It has been a year now that you were there and it has been more than 9 months since you left me. I have tried to move on from your memories but every time my heart comes and breaks down at them. If you were a person, my love would have been validated and my pain might have been felt by my fellow beings. But alas! People say that they understand, but they do not know my pain. They do not understand how I have cried for you, again and again, they do not understand the solace you brought to my heart, they do not understand how I lost a part of me when I lost you. How could they? A relationship between a man and an animal has always been defined by the perspective of the animals because you are the ones who don’t have a voice yet love the most. My pain becomes invalid because it is something they have never pondered upon, because we humans are selfish and we move on so easily. Then why is it that I cannot move on from you?
It is summer again, the same time when you would push your body against mine because you could not sleep otherwise. I never shared my bed with anyone yet you would sleep on it with me like it was yours, indeed it was yours. I never felt comfortable in that bed ever since. I Remember, you would never sleep with your mommy or play with her because you wanted me more than you wanted her, or so it seemed to be. You would not leave me alone for a moment; whenever I would go out of the home, you would start to panic and cry. And for that reason, I never stayed anywhere for more than a day. It is that time again when you made me fall in love with you when you made me believe that love transcends everything.
Dear Hachi, the reason that I am writing today is because I want to cry. I do not think I will ever be loved by a human being as much as you loved me. Once again today, someone let me down, someone let me know that I was hoping in vain. Just when I think I am there, I am never there. I think about you most of the times, I see you in every dog’s face. I know you will never be here again, you will never read this, you will never come again. But how much I hope to be proven wrong, just a wishful thinking. I wish I could hold you again and cry, cry because I am not perfect and I don’t think anyone else will love me but you. I hope you come back again, I hope we could share a bed again, I hope I could give you a life that you deserved.
My heart has come to a halt without you, I hope it is not over yet. I hope I could give all the love to someone that I couldn’t give you. I hope I could show someone what you showed me. Dear Hachi, I love you and I will till my dying breath.

My Love

In the corner of that Metro seat
There I saw a raging heat
Spark in those sweet eyes
Mercy of laughter at my heartbeats
Never knew what love looked like
Until it crashed into my heart
That one look, one smile
Taste of salvation set me apart
And I knew our hearts were beating together

Who knew you’d liked me too
And sky would be extraordinarily blue
When you asked me out, sweet lord
And laid by lake in the morning dew
Love looked like us suspended in the moonlight
And I crashed into your arms, my home
Our hearts were valleys of flowers
And your eyes were my greatest roam
And You knew our hearts were beating together

I remember when we fought the world
And you used your voice and words
The nights you couldn’t sleep, my love
Till you won and freed the birds
And Love looked like your wedding ring
Then flowers crashed on the aisle
Our dog we raised and lost, you cried
Like never before for months while
And we knew our hearts were beating together

I saw you across the street in the summer heat
Like the past was on repeat
Years just to come to this
When from bus you saved that kid
Love looked like tubes in your skin
Your strong smile crashed my strength
I carried you home when I knew I had to
You slept peacefully at the end
And I knew my heart was beating alone

Loud the colours

Reverent the pace

Hoping in bubbles

Obtuse to race

Walking to meadows

Talking the grace

Louder the bellow’s

Thunder in lace

When they come marching

Flowers and love

Nimbus in arm-swing

Spring gale above

See a revolution of rainbow

To ignite world a-glow

A Broken Man

I am down with drugs
February feels bright
Picking my bones dried dirt
My skin’s smeared in blight
My room is a mess
My heart is dirty white
An inch from foam around
The kid has now died
My love, my love is substituted
With the needles, the powder
I hear my life falling apart
This once its louder
I hear things and see them
Spirals of smoke I afloat
Aligned to the floor I fly
Drifting in my lonesome boat

I am down like silt
Naked in a broken lust
Shallow, so shallow is view
My penis is a replica of dust
My want loaths alone here
With a somber fun wasted
My soul is of salty sweat
I know, I have tasted
I am a brine of vile
Mounted in this silent room
With high flowing inside
Substance of meander doom
Days I spend, nights and in between
I fly in an unseen sky
Come find me lying in filth
Waiting for the world to die

Pain and Its Friends

The sky wore the blackening blue like a patch of hurt skin that shifts hues dolorously for the damage that has been so unkind, so unforgiving. The Vigour in the air that so far giggled with those snoozing little kids of hers was as silent and treacherous as the dying sun over some lone and sad desert existing in a forever ennui. The land beneath her paws that had been so appealing all this while had become appaling, for her offsprings were nowhere to be found.

She barely understood the meaning of death, she was not as sentinent as a human being. Her litter of pups that had not even opened their eyes yet had gone to silence just a week ago. Her breasts were bloated with milk, churning and aching to be sucked by those little mouths that were left open.

If only she understood how and why she had to find her little pups lying on the side of the road with that red flowing from their mutilated bodies, she could have felt bereaved at least but alas! All that she understood was that they would not move even after her many futile attempts.

Where had they gone to now? She had been crying on the streets, looking for them, but they were nowhere to be found. She had been feeling wrong all this time, how could it be? Wrong was the only thing she felt, without any definition, without any reference to it, it was just a feeling of ‘wrong’ that she always felt whenever she was wounded. Waiting by their unmoving bodies, waiting for them to wake up, she had fallen asleep by them, and oh! how wrong she was to. For when she opened her eyes they were gone, only the red was there; where had they gone to, abandoning her in that gruesome street? Why would they?

She could not understand what was happening, something so precious to her was vanished and she had no clue to where. Streets were gloomy, people looked at her with pity, she knew that look but she did not want bread from them, she wanted her pups.

Where possibly could they be gone? She had been bawling. Did she understand what sadness is? Did she understand what loss is? Was there any definition of the feelings in her world? All that she felt now was a longing, the ‘wrong’ had grown into ‘longing’ in no time, and it ate at her heart, much like one of those desperate times when she could not get food for days and it ate at her gut, perhaps worse than that.

People looked at her, yet again, she was digging another hole only to find handful of nothing. She had dug so many holes in that empty field, trying to find something desperately, crying loudly after each dig. There was a trail of dirt on the both sides of her face with a condemning desire in her black eyes and a pain in her body whenever she walked. She was unable to understand where she could find her pups again. She left the field once more, to look for them into another alley, milk was dripping from her breasts, she was bawling.

People that looked at her with pity till yet had started to feel irked. A dog crying in the neighborhood was a bad omen to them. It was time some of them aimed a piece of stone at her to hush her away.

Never Do

When my heart fails
Do I fail my heart?
By not keeping the promise
Of not letting it apart

When my heart fails
Am I the weakest then?
Or Am I the strongest?
For I take a leap when

When my heart shatters
Are my subtle sobs the sound?
Or my subterfuge want
Keeps it coming around?

When my heart is lost
Why are the beats not gone?
Or this echo fools me
To make me not bygone

Oh, when your heart is a damage
When our hearts do ravage
Why can we not salvage?
Instead of breaking down on wine
I swear, we all do fine
But we never do, never do.

​And when the soldiers got lost
She sent a raven to the east
May it find a trace of war
May it find a stranded peace

But rose the tides of silver land
Turning fate that sleigh of hand
The beast was down in dolour fire
Rave the raven for army’s ire

Beast was only pep of hope
Her rage was only for the pain
Army only fled for freedom
Peace was only blood in rain

So the end a fairy tale
Of clarus queen and monster pale

Oh if I wish to see the world
Give me a sight of infinity
A view spectacle of sky
With eternal unbound mobility
And when the comets rolling come
Or sun goes finally old, obese
When the moon will be but a star
Must I awe at the rave of these
A calligraphy of universe
Bamboozling, mysterious, poetic verse
Waves may ripple my soul a day
Of Andromeda’s carnality with MilkyWay
From lone plantes and cast out stars
To see ocean vapour go out of reach
Let me live a life in head
To Marvel my people’s universal breach
Oh, I am a man with an outrun dream
How distant yet true does it seem.

I found my heart
On a lonesome broken street
My youth walks around
With a fire in my feet
If I tell you what I want
Will I lose my sleep?
For dreams are all yours
And all that mine is weep
For there’s a flower in my ganrden
That I can’t give to any
I can’t sing in choir
I’ve heard singing many
My love is burning coal
Will you hold my hand?
It’s different from the others
Of an infertile sand
My heart may build a home
In that broken lonely street
Stained with wasted colours
Of hopes that often sleep
A world that never happened
A love that mourned for you
A heart that weary pauper
May rest in rust and rue

I come from a generation
Lost and bewildered
Broke, broken and braille
Where heart is just a toy
And dreams are unanswered
Where life is a marathon
On legs of ignorance
I come from a generation
Where flowers don’t smell
We quench our thirst with revenge
Water is so overrated
Where world is heating up
Yet people are turning cold
Where words, not bullets make holes
I come from a generation
Where no one is ever sure
Of being sure about facts
Where tears are fierce instruments
Lying, lynching and leeching
Where religion is still thriving
Where no one is ever whole again
I come from a generation
So vulnerable and sick in heart
Where vanity is the only end
Where rain not only grows wheat
But also pain in the chest
I come from a generation
Which is a masterpiece of broken art