The moment I saw him everything was a mess in my head
Everything in my brain jumbled
I knew not how he felt but I felt a lot
And I hugged him like I was to leave the earth
But he didn’t hug me back
I think it was his OCD
Or maybe he didn’t feel enough
Or Maybe the hug wasn’t perfect
Or maybe I wasn’t what he thought
Or maybe I did it in a rush
The green felt so vibrant and the sunny day felt cool
I walked alongside him and teased him as I could
Every time he talked I just watched his mouth
That voice was perfect, that face was surreal
I couldn’t help but notice how he carried himself
Or how he ate his food
Or how he looked at me with those eyes
Or how he laughed with those lips
Or how specs hanged on his eyes
Or how he curved his lips
Or how I held him in my eyes
Or how beautiful were those lips
I couldn’t stop thinking
Because that was the only time I breath around him
I couldn’t stop thinking because
He decided not to leave my head
How we wore the same shirts
It couldn’t be coincidence
How could he not think the same way
Or maybe he ruled all of my sense
How he smiled at me still hasn’t warded off the hypnotism
But he said he wanted to kiss someone else
Not knowing I had kissed him
A hundred times in my head in those four hours
I felt burnt when he looked at the other guys when all I looked at was him
How I tried to touch him just to feel his skin
That desire held me upside down
His name felt like a perfect noun
I could pronounce all day and won’t be bored
It’s hard for me to keep concentration on one thing
But he held me like gravity
I sat around him and it made me sing
We always thought that we were meant to be
How could I be left alone thinking the same
The last time he came to drop me off the city
I thought he would be gone
But he stood there until my bus went off
And when I looked outside and saw him standing there
All clicks in my head went off
How tears welded up for he felt real there
When I hugged him and he hurt me
I still felt here
Or how he said it wasn’t meant to be
Or how he looked perfect in yellow
Or how he told me to do things I didn’t understand
Or how he never talked again
Or how I kept waiting
Or how he kissed my best friend
Or how he fell in love with someone else
Or how I kissed someone for the first time in my head when I saw him
Or how he never felt the same
I keep thinking
How he fought with me all the time
I keep thinking
He never thought.


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